


Overwhelmed

by omgdatphantho



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Depression, Doctors, M/M, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-30 22:20:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8551366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/omgdatphantho/pseuds/omgdatphantho
Summary: Dan begins to suffer from depression and Phil just wants to help.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Based off a prompt that I was sent on Tumblr.
> 
> A/N:This story is a work of fiction and should be viewed as such. I want to stress that mental health is no joke. If you or someone you know are suffering, I urge you to seek help.

Phil’s worried. Dan’s been holed up in his room more often lately. Since they started dating, they’ve been using Phil’s room as their primary space. Things have changed lately. Dan’s gone back to sleeping in his own room.

There have also been other shifts that have caught Phil’s attention. Dan’s been pulling away from him; not being as affection as he usually is. He’s also been radio silent online. The fans are starting to notice and have expressed concern to Phil. He’s brushed it off as Dan being overly busy, but he’s starting to doubt the validity of his story. Dan’s appearing more tired as of late. Phil’s heard him pacing around his room at all hours of the night. He can’t ignore it any longer and decides to confront Dan.

Phil knocks cautiously on Dan’s door. He can hear a muffled noise coming from inside, but Dan doesn’t respond. With hesitation, Phil pushes open the door and steps inside.

Inside, the room is trashed. Clothes are strewed over the floor. Dirty dishes occupy the furniture surfaces. Even though it’s the middle of the afternoon, the shades are pulled tightly shut. Dan’s laying on the bed. He’s wrapped up in his comforter. The only lights on in the room come from his amber light in the corner and the glow of his laptop screen. Netflix plays on the screen.

“Dan?” Phil asks with caution. He picks his way to the bed through the minefield of Dan’s clothes. Dan doesn’t even look up at him. Phil carefully sits on the bed and touches Dan’s arm with care. Dan grunts at the contact.

“Dan? Can you look at me?” Phil asks. His voice is low and easy. Dan rolls over and looks at Phil for the first time. Phil’s breath catches in his throat.

Dan’s hair is curly and wild. It’s clear that he hasn’t washed it recently and is suffering from a bad case of bed head. His face is pale and gaunt. Dark circles reside under his his eyes. His usually sparkling brown eyes are dull and lifeless. Phil isn’t even sure if Dan’s registering what he’s looking at.

“Hmm?” Dan hums in response. Phil reaches out and pushes a few hairs off of his forehead. Dan makes no indication that he felt Phil’s hand.

“Are you okay? What’s going on with you?” Phil asks. Dan’s eyes shift lazily around the room, not looking at Phil.

“Nothing,” he responds. His voice is hoarse from disuse. Phil racks his brain for the last time he heard Dan speak. It has to be a few days at this point. He feels bad because clearly Dan isn’t alright and he should have seen this sooner.

“Please talk to me. It’s clearly not nothing. I just want to help,” Phil states. His voice strains as he starts pleading towards the end. Dan shakes his head. The sound of his hair scraping across the pillow can clearly be heard.

“It’s nothing Phil. You can’t help,” Dan states. His voice sounds flat and distant. Phil shifts back and grabs onto Dan’s shoulders. He pulls Dan up so they’re both sitting up on the bed. Dan doesn’t fight him. He allows Phil to pull him along. Phil wraps his arms around Dan in a hug. Dan doesn’t move to hug him back.

“Please talk to me Dan. I’m worried,” Phil whispers in Dan’s ear. Dan lets out a sigh. He pulls out of Phil’s embrace, but doesn’t move away from him.

“I’m pissed. I’m pissed because I’m stressed. I’m stressed because I have so much work to do and I don’t have the time nor the motivation to get it done,” Dan confesses. Phil nods his head, but says nothing. He gives Dan a small smile in encouragement of him continuing.

“Every day I think of all the stuff I have to get done and I get overwhelmed. I can’t concentrate on anything long enough to finish everything. Then I start thinking about all the people I’m disappointing by not getting things done. Then I get overwhelmed with that. That usually leads into me thinking that I can’t do anything right and that’s usually about the time my brain hurts. So I crawl back into bed and watch mind numbing tv because that’s the only way to stop my brain,” Dan finishes. He takes a few deep breaths, as if he’s trying to hold back tears.

Phil feels his heart start to break in two. He doesn’t know how he didn’t see this before. He wraps his arms around Dan and hold him close. He hears Dan sniffle in his ear. Dan’s shoulders start to shake as sobs begin to wreak his body. Phil pets down the back of Dan’s back and holds him while the other man cries.

“Make it stop Phil. Please. I don’t want to be like this,” Dan pleads. Phil hugs him tightly before pulling back and looking at Dan. Dan’s eyes are wet from tears and tear tracks have started making their way down his grimy face.

“It’s okay Dan. I’m going to be right here. We’re going to get you help,” Phil says. Dan nods before diving back into Phil’s shoulder. They sit there for a while. Phil trying to convey all his emotions into his hug.

The next day, Phil makes Dan a doctor’s appointment. They’re able to get in a few days later. Phil’s able to convince Dan to take a shower and get dressed. Dan clings to Phil’s side the whole way there. He won’t let Phil sit in the waiting area; insisting that he joins him in the room. They both talk to the doctor about the things Dan is experiencing. The doctor makes Dan take a test where he rates his feelings.

The doctor diagnoses Dan with depression. He stresses that Dan shouldn’t feel ashamed about it because it does happen and it doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with him. He explains that a lot of people suffer from varying degrees of depression throughout their lives. He refers Dan to a therapist.

Dan goes back to his routine of locking himself away from the world. Phil reminds him how amazing he is and how there is nothing to feel ashamed of. Dan insists that he’s broken and unfixable. Phil holds him while he cries and whispers sweet words lovingly into his ear.

A week later is Dan’s first therapy session. Phil insists on accompanying him, even though he will wait in the reception area. Dan goes in and answers all of the therapists questions. He tells her about himself, Phil, their jobs, and what he’s feeling. She listens quietly; only asking the occasional question. He leaves the session with a prescription for an antidepressant, another appointment for the next week, and a little bit less weight in his chest.

Phil tries his best to be there for Dan. He praises Dan’s small accomplishment and distracts him when he becomes overwhelmed. He’s made it very clear that Dan’s not going to be alone in this. Dan’s appreciate of the fact that Phil’s willing to stay with him.

Dan’s mood improves as the days pass. The medication helps and having someone to talk to does even better things for him. He starts taking care of things again and focuses on the little things. Phil smiles, encourages him, and peppers his face with kisses. Dan’s laughter and smile returns to their flat.

Some days are still hard. Some times he still gets overwhelmed and spends the day in bed. Phil joins him to cement to Dan that he’s not alone. He cuddles and comforts Dan during those times. Everything has taken some getting use to, but they’ve just rolled with it. Phil’s not going anywhere and Dan’s going to keep getting better.


End file.
